"If it's not Scottish, it's Crap!"

Flavored potato chips are nothing new, but a Scottish company has decided to add a definitely local taste to its chips. Mackie's Scottish Potato Chips (or 'crisps' as they are known on the island) have added the taste of haggis, a traditional dish consisting of sheep offal, to their chips. In a less than stellar review, the taste is described as; "surprisingly more delicious than it sounds." Another featured flavor that got my attention, and may be more worthy of a try, Flame-grilled Aberdeen Angus. Enjoy!

Not you average chips.

The World's Most Perfect Food.

You may have never heard the name Vilhelm Lillefläsk, but this man should be in the food Hall of Fame. The Swedish WW2 veteran (still alive and kicking) is the creator of Squeeze Bacon. Yes, bacon that can be squeezed from a ketchup-like bottle. Check out the site where you can get some of your own. Amazing!

Squeezy, bacon-y deliciousness!

Bacon As An Art Form.

Mike Geno is an artist who has chosen to memorialize bacon on canvas (paper, actually), and it looks good enough to eat. I'd put these on my walls with pleasure, though I might be continually hungry. Check the site out for yourself.

Mmmmmm, canvas bacon.

Ho, Ho, Ho...Not!

Tender moments from an obviously over-served Santa. Note the bumper face plant. Good stuff, and a cautionary tale to all you budding Santas out there.

Pork Nativity Scene.

Photo: Wenn.com

 

A plethora of pork and a blanket of kraut make this the most jolly (and fattening) of depictions. Yum!

O come all ye...hungry.

Now I'm In The Spirit.

A Canadian lingerie company decided that the best way to show their wares (and get tongues a waggin') this holiday season was to do a commercial with a bevy of attractive females (called the 'Cup Size Choir') from A to G...cup size that is. Happy watching!

I hope they come carolling to my door.

Why, Why, Why?

Because there is no limit to the tastelessness that is the Xmas season, I bring you the thing every parent is hoping for their pre-pubescent daughter...a tassel t-shirt. This "piece of art" as the British-based website calls it, will only set you back about $600. How many can I put you down for?

Pole dancer in training?

Bacon Xmas Cards?! It Had To Happen.

I have been looking for suitable Xmas cards for this year, and being a bacon lover (No! Really?!), I think I have found what I'm looking for. A quick visit to the Etsy website found these cards, featuring a bacon Xmas tree. Enjoy, and order soon!

Oh, and I'll be doing a post down the road on the creator(s) of these cards.

Cards for carnivores. 

Get In The Holiday Spirit...With Spirits!

In this season of parties and gatherings, liquid libations take center stage. Instead of the usual beer and wine, why not spice things up with some seasonally-appropriate spirits. A quick visit to the "Mr Booze" website will give you plenty of ideas from a Winter Mojito (pic left) to a Christmas (or 'Holiday' for you politically correct types) Martini. Cheers!

Ho, ho, ho! Let's party!

When Fast Fingers Can Get You In Trouble.

That pesky auto-correct feature on the iPhone. Not only does it come up with stupid word suggestions, but it also remembers your most typed words, usually at the most inopportune times. Now there is a website that captures all the hilarity and embarrassment that goes along with texting the wrong words to the wrong person at the wrong time, thanks to auto-correct. "Damn You, Auto-Correct" is the site. Enjoy, and think before you text.

You do what?! To whom?!

Yes, This Is Food Porn. And I Love It!!

The "Epic Meals" YouTube channel is made up of - from what I can tell - a bunch of bored, crazy Canadians whose only mission in life is to create culinary monstrosities such as the "Massive Meat Log", better know as the "Chuck Norris of Corn-dogs". Not only that, but they have a cute girl at the end of each video sample their dish. Oh, and there is usually a large amount of bacon involved (check out their Thanksgiving "Tur-Bacon" episode). Good watching! 

Coronary alert! 

"I Said What?! To Who?! On Facebook?!"

We have all heard of drunk dialing. Wouldn't it be great if there was a way to stop our drunken urges to make an idiot of ourselves on social media sites? Well now there is; 'The Social Media Sobriety Test', which when installed on your comp, prevents you from drunk posting by making you pass a little test before gaining access to your social media. And if you fail the test - which includes following a finger with your mouse - the program will post for you. Pretty cool.

"I'm not as think as you drunk I am."

And check out the tutorial for 'The Social Media Sobriety Test' on YouTube.

YouTube video.


Now if you refuse to be safe, then you could become very sorry. Another website 'Texts From Last Night' aims to make light of the drunken idiots out there who just insist on picking up the smartphone after one too many. The results are hilarious. Check it out.

"Wait, I am as think as you drunk I am."

Ho, Ho, Ho...Not!

Growing up, the standard Xmas threat was "you'll get coal in your stocking if you aren't good". Well, have you ever wanted to make that threat come true for those who actually deserve it? Well, now you can. 'Coal-gram' allows you to send an actual piece of coal to members of Congress or even the President. AND a portion of the proceeds go to charity. Show the pols what you think of them by sending a little lump of black stuff...coal, that is.

Real coal in their stockings this year.

10 Course Pork Dinner At Dino's In DC.

Yes, you read that right. A 10(?!) course pork dinner called "The Three Little Pigs". Utilizing three kinds of pigs (hence the name); Duroc, Kurobuta & Porcelet. This is a one-time thing at Dino's Italian Restaurant in Washington, DC and has offerings from an appetizer called "Trotter Tots" to dessert featuring a chocolate torte with pancetta & aleppo pepper. All for $65. Check out the menu. I'm looking for a date. Just sayin'.


Piggie in 10 ways.

Yeah, But What A 30 Seconds It Is!

Papa John Goes Bacon...Double Bacon.

I've always been so-so on Papa John's pizza. Given other delivery options, I'd gladly go with Pizza Hut, and if I am desperate, Domino's. My opinion my have been swayed by Monday's announcement that Papa John's will serve a Double-Bacon, Six-Cheese pizza (or w/their Tuscan Six-Cheese). Wow. I have yet to taste this, but it is on my list for Turkey-day weekend football watching. Get your own at PapaJohns.com. Update to follow.


Bacon. Double good on pizza!

Bacon. Bikini. Are There 2 Greater Words In The English Language?

A bacon bikini contest?! How did I not think of this? Wish I had been there to see it. Perusing the website, I have not been able to find any rhyme or reason as to why this event occurred and/or if anything like it will occur again. At least we have photographic evidence. Enjoy!

Bacon...in the raw!

Cupcakes With Booze!

I am a frequent cupcake poster, and with good reason, they are awesome! But just when I thought I'd seen everything, here are cupcakes with beer, wine, and all sorts of liqueurs. (Cacao) - that is how they spell it - offers their mini delights made with Guinness stout as well as Newcastle and Blue Moon (see left). And you can order on-line so there is no eating and driving.

Get your daily Guinness...in a cupcake!

Why Sponge Bob Is My Hero.

Bra-Stuffing In A Good Way.

Another "wish I thought of that" product. The 'Wine Rack' (Ha! Pun intended, I'm sure) is a bra that is also a flask. "Turn those A cups into D's" and make some friends with beverages out of your bra! Only problem; the less wine, the less boob. Well, by that time nobody will care. Holds 750ml.

This would be good for concerts.

Bacon Ice Cream Sandwiches.

What is better than bacon ice cream? A bacon ice cream sandwich...served from a food truck! Coolhaus food truck in LA serves Brown Butter with Candied Bacon ice cream sandwiched between your choice of homemade cookies (like Snicker-doodle, Ginger Molasses or Peanut Butter Banana!). Oh, and the wrapper is also edible. Yum!

The coolest 'haus' on wheels.

Best Invention Ever?

Because TV, beer, and a lack of physical activity are all a real man wants, I give you another amazing invention that I wish I thought of: the "Clicker". It is a universal remote and bottle opener in one. Because even twist-offs can be a hassle, why not have an opener? Now if there were only a way to fit bacon in there somewhere.

Clicker - Official site

Well, I Suddenly Have A Date Open.

A truly sad story, for the rich in England, that is. It seems that because of the current economic uncertainty, the Queen has decided that it would be unladylike to flaunt her lifestyle in front of the working stiffs. That's right, the annual Christmas gala has been canceled. Check out the story from CNN and try not to get your knickers in a bunch.

Oh, poppycock!

Greatest Popcorn Related Invention Ever?

Another entry for the "why didn't I think of this" file. Ever have movie popcorn (duh, who hasn't) with butter, that was only buttery on top? Then you get to the middle and bottom and there is nothing but a dry, salty wasteland? Well, I give you the Flavor Funnel.This simple piece of plastic allows butter (or the chemical concoction that passes for butter) to mercifully pass to every layer, nook and cranny of your popcorn bag. Ensuring a future visit to the emergency room. Awesome!   

Those sounds you hear are arteries clogging.

Back In My Day It Was ZIMA.

How is it that this is the first I'm hearing of this stuff? I guess the latest drink of choice for the underage crowd is 'Four Loko', basically an ass-kicking concoction of caffeine, the crap in Red Bull, and three beers worth of alcohol (11%). All available in fruity (read: chick-friendly) flavors in the cooler section of your local 7-11. From this news article, it appears that trips to the emergency room are fairly normal after chugging this stuff. Well, now you know, don't chug this stuff. My public service announcement for the day.

News article.
Four Loko - official site. 

Maple Bacon Donut!

I was saving this one, but too many people have asked me "have you seen...?", so here goes. The Maple Bacon Bar from Voodoo Doughnuts in Portland, OR. Voodoo looks like possibly the greatest place in the universe. How can you not like a place who's motto is: "the magic is in the hole". Not only do they have bacon, but their menu is littered with creations right out of a kid's dreams; Captain Crunch, Coco Puffs, M&M's and Fruit Loops adorn doughnuts with some un-kid-like names (Cock n' Balls, Gay Bar, and the Memphis Mafia). Don't forget the Voodoo Doll, with raspberry jelly 'blood' and a pretzel stake in the heart. Portland is looking like a 'must' for my next vacation. Oh, and they also perform weddings on-site. Catering extra.

Doughnut awesomeness!

Bacon Dental Floss.

Let's face it, oral hygiene is boring. Why not liven it up, with say, bacon flavored dental floss! Found this on Amazon, so you know it HAS to be good (have to say that, they are one of my banner ads). Finish off a bacon-y meal with some bacon-y floss.

4 out of 5 dentists surveyed recommend it.

UPDATE: I should have perused a little longer before the initial post, because I hit the mother-lode: Breakfast Floss! Consisting of the above mentioned bacon flavor, but adding coffee and waffle flavors as well. Wow!

The whole enchilada.  

McRib Update: It's Coming!

An update to a post from earlier this week, promoting the 'McRib Locator' website. It appears that McDonald's, right on cue, will for the first time in 16 years, offer the McRib nationwide. The date to circle on your calendar? November 2nd. Can't wait!

Get ready for some 'rib!

Beer Scented Candle.

This may not be the first thing you want to smell the morning of a hangover (for that, see today's other post), but for all other times, the beer scented candle may be just the thing. For less than the cost of a 12-pack you can have 70 hrs of beer smell without the chance of alcohol-fueled dance moves or questionable hook-ups. Why go for some wimpy, flowery, fruity concoction when you can have a lager!

Mmmmmm, beer smell.

Pancakes & Bacon Cookies!

'The Cravory', a custom bakery in San Diego, offers you the opportunity to design your very own cookie from a veritable plethora of ingredients, with up to 950 possible combinations. Among the eclectic flavors in their permanent collection are; Lemon Cherry Basil, Mexican Hot Chocolate, and Oreo Milkshake. But the variety that caught my eye (go figure) was the Pancakes & Bacon. Containing maple bacon, maple syrup, and pancake mix, this cookie captures the essence of the best breakfast you can imagine. Mmmmmm, I can smell it from here. Check out the site!  

Breakfast in a cookie.

McRib Locator.

There are legions of pork aficionados out there that cannot be satisfied by anything less than the greatest processed pig product ever...the McDonald's McRib sandwich. The delicacy - a pork patty shaped like a slab of ribs, with onions and pickles - made its debut amidst great fanfare in 1981 and has been highly sought after ever since. The problem is, McDonald's only allows it to be sold at certain restaurants at certain times, often for less than a month. This has led to McRib lovers to go to the web in search of their treat. I give you the 'McRib Locator'. Sightings and tips are placed on-line and the pig pursuers are on their way. Yum!

This way to McRib fueled happiness.   

If you care for more info on the awesomeness that is the McRib, check out this 'deconstruction' (including ingredients and health info) of the sandwich.

Food Facts web site.

Urban Camouflage (Part 2).

Traveling to the big city and can't afford a hotel room? Got booted out of your place but still like the neighborhood? Don't have a car, but love to park? For any of those scenarios I have your solution: the Car Tent. No word on if you can get a ticket in this thing or not.

Cheaper, and more reliable than a Yugo!

Urban Camouflage (Part 1).

Here is the scenario: you are wandering down the street and suddenly a guy attempts to mug you. Off you run, with the mugger in hot pursuit. Instead of calling the cops, you duck around a corner and...become a soda machine. The mugger runs right past, or in the worst case, drops a few coins in your pants. Welcome to Japan. This quirky, crime-fighting idea is courtesy of fashion designer Aya Tsukioka. Check out the NY Times article.

Ha, ha! You can't see me! 

Halloween Themed Sex Toys!

Being a lover of all holidays, I decided it was about time to get into the Halloween spirit. And what better way to get ghoulish, than with some sex toys? Well, this article from the Seattle Weekly does a good job of putting the scary into things that go bump (or is it bang) in the night. Only thing I don't like is it seems to be heavily geared to the females, and the one device that is for the guys truly IS scary. Thanks to one of my FB friends for sending this. Boo!

Very scary!

Outlast The Zombies. With Bacon!

It is not an 'if' but a 'when'. The zombie menace is coming. Will you be prepared? After securing weapons and ammo, the next logical step is food, and why not start with the best food: bacon. 'Tactical Bacon' is fully cooked, canned, and with a 10 year shelf life, it will be ready for the coming, lawless hysteria. 'ThinkGeek' sells this, and many other zombie survival supplies.


Bacon, ready when you are.

Bacon Double-Shot!

From "This is Why You're Fat":

The All-Bacon Sandwich (w/Wild Turkey chaser)

Bacon-wrapped Reese's cups...deep-fried(?!)

Today's WTF?! Moment: Justin Bieber Nail Polish.

The continuation of the mega-branding of Justin Bieber is as certain as the sun rising and setting. But this is an odd one, at least to me since I am not a consumer of female make-up products. I don't really get the connection between the Just-meister and nail polish, but for those who do, there are several colors (14, to be exact) like; 'One less Lonely Glitter', 'Prized Possession Purple', 'Me and Blue', and 'OMB!'. Teen girls everywhere are shrieking in delight. Available soon exclusively at Wal-Mart.

Will the madness never end??

What Would Ponch Say?

Back after a long, Columbus Day weekend. Hope you missed me!
We start out with a news article that just has me shaking my head with sadness at how my one of my childhood heroes has fallen. Ok, maybe 'hero' is a stretch, but I definitely had the CHiPs lunchbox! Larry Wilcox, who played Jon Baker, the straight man to Erik Estrada's saucy Italian Stallion (yeah, no admitted Hispanics on TV in those days) 'Ponch' Poncherello, was popped by the feds in a penny-stock fund scam. The story varies, but one site (www.debbieschlussel.com) is claiming that Wilcox pleaded guilty to a reduced charge and then became an informant. Good stuff.

Why, Jon, why?   

Burger Heaven Opens In NYC.

The Burger King Whopper Bar has opened in NYC and things may never be the same. Amongst the items that are unique to this 'premium' Burger King location (one of four nationwide) is the 'Meat Beast Whopper', which adds bacon and pepperoni to the classic Whopper burger. Also, you can create your own Whopper by adding on of the many available toppings, among them; 2 types of bacon (pepper and smoked), guacamole, and jalapenos. No details on if the Whopper Bar will be a meat market. 


Burger King does uptown.

30 Days Of Speed Creating.

I stumbled upon this dude in my usual stumbling ways. Dominick Wilcox is a self-described artist, designer and inventor. His blog - Variations on Normal - showcases his work and the deep recesses of his mind. The post that caught my interest was '30 Days of Speed Creating'. Every day - for 30 days - he attempted to create a piece of something creative and/or useful out of ordinary items. For no apparent reason. The results are interesting, to say the least. From the 'business card presenter tie' and 'onion ring fabric' to 'bread objects', this guy is definitely a variation of normal.


Stuff you need...or not. 

Ham. Spanish Style.

The famous black-footed Iberian pigs of Spain (who knew there was such a thing?) lend their name to a suburban Atlanta restaurant that has (pardon the pun) gone "hog wild" in their pig-related offerings. The Iberian Pig (the restaurant) serves the rare and highly sought after Jamon Iberico ham from the Iberian pig (the animal). This prosciutto-like delicacy is sliced for you table side. Joining its prized cousin, The Iberian Pig (the restaurant) serves a variety of other Iberian pig (the animal) treats. Iberian ham is also good for you; rich in iron, magnesium, calcium, phosphorous, vitamins B1, B2 and niacin, and the fat in Spanish ham is made up of oleic acid (the ‘good´ fat found in olive oil). And if all that isn't enough, you can wash it all down with an Iberian Old-Fashioned, made with bacon-infused rye. One more reason to visit Atlanta.

Don't be a ham, eat some ham.

Bacon Shoes...But Only For Women. Crap.

Why do women get to have all the fun?! One of my Facebook friends sent this to me, and despite already having a bacon post today, I had to put it right up. Zazzle.com is where you can get 'em. I will be examining the shoes of the ladies I meet a little more closely now.


But do they smell as good as they look? 

Your Daily Moment Of Bacon Zen.

Yes, that is bacon cotton candy. A bacon 'stick' with plain sugar cotton candy, dusted with dehydrated bacon. Created by the now defunct Blupoint Restaurant in Chicago. Would have liked to have tried that.

Mapping Stereotypes.

This site is the product of UK-based graphic designer Yanko Tsvetkov. On it he takes the map of Europe and labels each country as it is seen (stereotypically) by another country. The 'how the US sees Europe' is particularly hilarious. Though I know it is satire, I'm thinking the 'US view' he depicts if fairly accurate (see above). Other 'views' that I will assume are spot on (since I don't live in any of the other countries) are; Europe according to France (they see Sweden as 'meatball eaters'), Europe according to Italy (they see Turkey as 'belly dancers'), and Europe according to Russia (they see Ireland as 'drunks'...see stereotypes are often based in truth).

I'm moving in stereo(types).

Photo Of The Day: This Seems Like A No-Brainer To Me.

Is this really that big an issue that it requires signage?

A Great Advertisement For Birth Control.

"Shit My Kids Ruined" has awesome photos, submitted by the blog's readers, of disasters and destruction that can result from mere moments of child inattentiveness. From painting the cat, to the disgusting 'poop gloves' (something you need to see), and...glitter, this is a condom advertisement in the making. Also, they have a sister site; "Shit My Pets Ruined". More visual evidence that living as a hermit in the middle of nowhere, away from animals and people, is the way to go.


Demon spawn on the loose.

Some Serious Coffee Here.

"...may promote feelings of mania, zania, euthanasia, fantasia, and all manner of paranoia. Should not be consumed by minors." So goes the opening description of "Meth Coffee", a stronger than strong blend of Joe that was apparently created by a bunch of escapees from an insane asylum. Or, are they crazy like a fox? This coffee has an amped up dose of caffeine and the herb 'yerba mate' (no, there isn't any meth in it). The website 'Live Science' did a story on Meth Coffee and yerba mate, and described the herb as such: "...it appears to create a mental state of wakefulness and alertness, but without some of the negative effects of caffeine (like heart palpitations and anxiety)." Check out the very entertaining and manic website, along with a mildly disturbing commercial. If you are into coffee that kicks your ass, or are looking to stay up really late tonight, try some Meth Coffee. And I even have a banner ad at the top of the site, so click it and get it!


Meth Coffee - Official Site
'Live Science' article.